Thursday, May 14, 2009

half empty...

this time it hit sam. we left for winnipeg yesterday morning at 5.40 and by 10.30 he was feeling sick and not the best and by noon he wa throwing up and fevered... and we still had our big appt. with dr. goldberg to go thru! we got to the appt and got right into the office so sam could lay down and sleep.
so i am working from home again today so he can sleep and get better. he had a fever so hopefully he feels better this morning ...

I want to say that i had a good feeling after all our appt.s but i think i am becoming a pessimist. Not my usual area of 'expertise' but where i slowly feel myself drifting towards. I am just tired of talking to doctors and feeling like we are going backwards. dennis thinks that our visits finally got thru to them and that they finally are 'getting' what we are talking about and that we need support and help... but i just feel blah.
we did get some good news and here it is:
1.) sam is now 'all clear' for activities-- with the understanding that he has to be smart about things and wear proper equipment (helmets, etc)
2.) there is very little risk of infection now
3.) sam will not only be taking wednesdays off at home to rest, but he will also be done classes every day at 2.30. he will stay at school but he will be resting and trying to give his brain a rest before he comes home
4.) his exams will all be written in the morning
5.) we will be hearing from the psychologist again for another evaluation

Dr. Goldberg thinks that with these last 2 new routines that they will help with his fatigue and help elevate his melt downs at home. so we will see. both dennis and i have noticed a big difference in sam over the last month that we have kept him home on wednesdays but he still has his moments.
there was also a 'break through' with sam when he admitted to the doctor that he doesnt realize when he is losing control. he doesnt know when he is fatigued either. so maybe with teh psychologist he will learn how to recognize them when it starts.
the TBI co-ordinator was not impressed with how little help we have had thru all and then went on to say how she didnt like how i was getting my info from the internet-- but then if we are not getting help from the doctors-- where else are we to get help for things from!? i was just a bit frustrated and my general feeling yesterday (and still today) is too little too late for us. we are 9 months from the accident and just starting to get the doctors to help us. school is almost over and we are moving into summer so tha means a new schedule and then we are onto high school-- more new schedules.
i am trying to adopt dennis' optomism but it is a struggle this time... right noal i want to do is cry and throw things. maybe things will look better tomorrow.

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