Tuesday, September 2, 2008


Samuels recent mood swings are beginning to get to me. I know that they could be attributed to:

A) his personality
B) his brain injury
C) his age
D) slep apnea
E) all of the above (this is my choice)

but today i just want to sit and cry! 'Everyone' is making him mad, 'everything' is putting him in a foul mood. He might be upset about school starting tomorrow and i am hoping i am able to drive comfortably so i can take him in for a bit to see his friends... but that is NOT helping him or me with this attitude and moodiness. I am feeling very frustrated and irritated by his mood. I have tried to explain that he needs to go to his room for a bit to get away from everyone until he feels he can deal with what ever was bothering. He can pray, punch a pillow, cry, write, draw... whatever it takes but all i get is silence, crossed arms and glares. But he goes to his room and i pray... or i try to ...
My brain is so full of everything that has gone on, is going on and what is coming up with not just Sam but with the other kids, Dennis, my mom and life in general, that i keep feeling like i am losing this battle. I am so tired of smiling and telling people that all is fine and we can handle this... some days i am not so sure-- other days i am positive we can.

1 comment:

Jellyarmsrme said...

Sounds like you need some hugs....(((((((((()))))))))))).

My grandma always says "It's a great life if you don't weaken." I used to think she was cynical and maybe a touch bitter...but knowing what I know about her life story combined my my growing up...I think she's got it right on.

Make sure you let yourself find some support too. I know us moms try to be strong for everyone else...but we can't be that strong all the time without some support for us too.

Great big hugs!!!!!!!!!!!